Tuesday, October 11, 2016

On Standing Behing Women- What I Know and Mr Trump Never Learned


The huge blowback against Donald Trump's body language during the debate- particularly his propensity to stand behind Hillary Clinton when she was talking in a way that struck many women as intimidating- brings to mind something I experienced when I was younger which hints at the saliency of that issue
For those of you who haven't met me in person. I am a fairly large person -6'0' tall and over two hundred pounds. Before I was hobbled by multiple surgeries, I liked to walk extremely fast when I was in the street or on a subway platform,, passing most people as I whizzed by
However, I learned to slow myself down whenever I was walking a street which was dark or relatively sparsely populated because of the response of women when I passed them. Many were terrified. They heard the footsteps as I approached and thought the worst- that I was someone who was going to rob them or assault them This didn't happen just once. It happened many many times until I learned to slow down and simply accept that I couldn't walk fast without making women';s hearts race.
At the time, I attributed it to the muggings and robberies that were fairly prevalent in NYC from the late 60's through the mid 90's, but in retrospect, I think the fears might have also come from experiences with men that were much more private and personal
In any case, I learned something then that Mr Trump apparently doesn't know or doesn't care about- that when you are a large man, you don't hover over,,walk behind or stand close to women when you are angry or in a hurry because it triggers fears and traumas that come from a lifetime of negative experience.
It would be ironic, though in some way appropriate, if his failure to abide by that ends up being one of the nails in the coffin for his Presidential prospects.

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